A strange new road

A strange new road

My journey through depression has been tough and the road hard, but I have always been able to see the goal at the end.  Even in the darkest times, I hung on to the believe that I would find the old me one day and my life would be good again.  In fact, many times, it was that belief, along with God, that got me through.

Here lately, I have been praying for understanding. There have been so many changes over the last four years.  I feel lost and unsure of what I am supposed to do.  I asked God to guide me through and help me to know what I am supposed to do in life.  

Day by day he is blessing me with new insight on how to proceed on my journey.  Today, he showed me something I was not expecting.  My goal of finding the old me is not going to happen because the old me is gone.  She didn't make  it through the journey.  I have to find another road that will lead to someone I haven't met yet:  The new me.

The thought of this new journey is terrifying and exciting.  

Here I go 

Nothing Last Forever

Nothing Last Forever

This is what I hold on to when my world turns dark.  Living with Depression, I get caught up in the dark.  I forget that the sun will shine again.

I feel as if darkness and light are in a battle inside my head and I am just standing on the sidelines waiting to see who wins.

I need to join the fight. Help the light destroy the dark.  I am frozen though.  It is a very long hard battle and I get so tired.  There are times  that I stop caring who will win.  There are even a few times that I secretly hope the dark wins.  Thankfully God steps in, wakes me up, and helps me to start cheering for the light again.

The day will come when I am strong enough to join the battle.  I have faith in that.

Nothing last forever.  The dark night will end.

God is with me during the dark, so I know that when the light does shine, it will shine brighter then I could have ever imagine.

The Bumpy Road

The Bumpy Road

Along our journey through life there are times we have a choice between taking the easy road or the bumpy road.

The easy road is smooth and flat without any hills and valleys There are not any potholes obstacles to dodge. There isn't a whole lot of scenery to look at. It's a safe road to travel

The bumpy road is a roller coaster ride of hills and valleys. There are many obstacles to dodge. It contains some scary turns. It's a dangerous road but the scenery is amazing.

The choice is yours.

Just Breathe

Just Breathe

It has been a while since I have written. It has been a ride. I am on antidepressants and they are working pretty good. Now the real work begins. After a few missteps, I finally figured out that I needed to slow down and breathe. I am now taking baby steps.

I have also decided to go to therapy. l need the tools to help me learn to live again.

I don't know how long it will take to get to my life, but Im ready for the journey